Danny doesn't like tomatoes

But here's a laundry list of what he does like on his sub:



















Special thanks to my mom for scanning and emailing this to me with the description of, "Isn't he the cutest little thing?"

Yep. Real cute.

she's a lady

In an effort to mock (er, I mean, celebrate) Lydia's classy lady attire, James donned a wrap/decorative throw. And after discovering an apparent stockpile of wraps/decorative throws in my office, Cristina and I joined the fun. Nobody, however, dons a wrap as chicly as Lydia. The sunglasses don't hurt, either!



(Left to right: me, Lyds, Cristina, Mr.JR)

Joo get that thing I left you?

By guest blogger Mr.JR (not Mister Junior, but Mister JayArr)

Joanna and I have this game and it all really started after I saw No Country for Old Men. A couple of weeks afterwards, I was footing my way over to my office when I spotted something out of place, some sort of electronic gadget that was tossed near a garbage can, but not into it. It’s carelessness like that that makes Italian men dressed like Native Americans cry.

Naturally, my childlike sense of wonder compelled me to pick it up and stuff it in my pocket… a natural addition my weird collection of oddments, like the plastic magnifying box full of miniature babies or two wooden busts of a preteen version of the dad from Teen Wolf. He looks like a Howard.

As I sat down at my desk, I pulled out the yellowing, gray box that was about the size of a garage door opener. It even had the infrared bulb, but there was no button and no part of it was particularly pushable. It was right around this time that I made a grand connection: the box reminded me of the transponder from the aforementioned feature film (NFCOM, not TW)! I asked myself how I could have some fun with it and the solution came quickly: I’d slip it into people’s stuff… bags, jacket pockets, hoods and the like. They’d pull it out and just wonder where in the hell it came from and how it got there. I get giddy at inciting that sort of confusion, you see.

I don’t remember how the first bout of smuggling went, but Joanna and I have been engaged in a sly battle of handoffery since November. It’s usually the next day or a couple days after the placement when one of us will materialize at the other’s office with the simple inquiry; “So, uh, did you get that thing I left you?” I started saying that as a slight homage to Peter Potamus in the Harvey Birdman context.

This last time was one of the finest, I think. As Joanna was having a supersecret discussion with my neighbor in clandestine fashion behind closed doors, I darted to her office in search of the next hiding spot. Jacket pocket? Done that. Desk drawer? Naw, boring (she got me real good by tossing it in my tea mug once). As I quickly scanned her desktop, thinking she was going to appear at any moment, I found potential salvation in a Tupperware container, tucked between two slices of whole grain bread. I popped off the lid and much to my surprise, there was no fancy filling like organic peanut butter in this sammy-to-be, making for primo, non-messy placement. After sneaking in the transponder, I lovingly patted the top slice like a mother would who’s putting her son to bed. I went to my office and waited.

The payoff came as I’d hoped. As Joanna rounded the reception desk with sandwich in hand, I leaned back and grinned through the door with satisfaction. The notion of introducing potentially deadly microbes to her lunch had never crossed my mind until she lifted the top piece, revealing the dirty transponder which looked cozily transplanted.

Acknowledging my inconsideration, I wrote Joanna a blank check for my chicken nuggets from Wendy’s. I don’t offer up my nugs for no good reason, but I knew that what I was doing was right, though she only cashed in for one.

When Javier Bardem comes looking for his money, I hope the transponder is out of my hands. The last thing I need right now is a cattlestunning.

I also really hope that Joanna enjoyed that last nugget.

-Mr.JR

PS: LYDIA! LYDIA! LYDIA! LYDIA! LYDIA! LYDIA!

PPS: Joanna, here. If you thought I was going to let something as trivial as a germ-laden transponder ruin my gardenburger sammy, think again! Also, I feel our transponder tomfoolery has officially jumped the shark with this guest post. Perhaps we should identify some new, unsuspecting targets...any ideas?!??!!?!?

Hey mon!

Just when I thought I couldn't be any more excited about Jamaica...

Here's another classic! Hint: scroll down about 60 percent of the page and click on "Back from Vacation" Clip 2

Sweet candy confection - they're back!

Like any self-respecting Chicks & Rabbits lover, I've been aware of the return of my favorite Easter treat for more than a month. However, in a fit of righteous self-denial, I forbade myself from purchasing any until the week of Easter. Why? WHY??? Because I'd eat 17 bags, that's why!

I mean, just look at the little guys:

Talk about tasty. I've been loving me some Chicks & Rabbits since I was a kid. They bear an uncanny resemblace to circus peanuts but their seasonally-limited availability makes them superior. It's been said that they smack slightly of banana, which I would agree with. In fact, my sister once mailed me exactly four banana-flavored dum dums with a note that said (and I'm not paraphrasing here): "these are nasty. they taste like circus peanuts. you'll like them." Ipso facto, Chicks & Rabbits kinda taste like banana.

While the flavor has remained consistently delicious, the colors have changed over the years. I distinctly remember a mix of pink, purple, and yellow when I was younger. The pink ones always had that vaguely ink-like aftertaste that pink conversation hearts and pink cotton candy occasionally have as well. Perhaps the updated yellow, blue, and orange color scheme is an improvement.

I've tried to introduce many people to the glory of Chicks & Rabbits without much success. The only person I know who likes them as much as I do is my mom! Perhaps the taste for Chicks & Rabbits is somehow genetic? Quick, break out the Punnett square! As of today, I can add one more person to the list of enlightened Chicks & Rabbits fans: my co-worker, Tami! When she recognized the rogue rabbit that Mr. JR was waving crazily in front of her office door, I knew she was hooked. She even remembers the aforementioned original colors! I celebrated this discovery with a hearty portion of Chicks & Rabbits, followed by a soothing cup of chamomile and lavender tea.

WHATever

While at home this afternoon waiting for the plumber to arrive and completely ruin my life, I stumbled upon this gem:



For anyone who wasn't watching loads of TGIF in the early 90s (as if!), you might not be aware of this series based on the hit movie Clueless. It rocked! I loved it! I was thirteen!

Today's episode on "The N" network (which, I presume, is a teen spin on Nickelodeon? I dunno) was a real treat, featuring Bronson Pinchot (HELLO! Balki, anyone?????) as a wacked-out celebrity hairstylist with an unidentifiable accent. Pretty amazing!

Plot summary for Episode #4: Do We with Bad Haircuts Not Feel?

Cher falls for new boy Harrison and the two become an item. Everything in the relationship is great, and Cher's new love interest is popular with her friends because of his Father's job in a Record Company which leads to free music gigs for the gang. Meanwhile, Travis' feelings for Cher are growing and he plucks up the courage to sit and talk with her at lunch break. He talks with her about the 'stages of death' that people go through when facing death. Murray and Shawn are not impressed. Back at her house, Cher discusses the upcoming summer prom with Dionne and Amber. The two urge her to go for a new haircut after she presents them with the dress she wants to wear. But upon arriving at the salon, Cher is dissapointed to discover her usual stylist Taki is no longer cutting hair - she wants to be a colourist. However, she does mention Cher to hot celebrity stylist of the moment Ka-Feen.

Back at school, Cher's appointment with Ka-Feen causes much annoyance for Amber who had been trying to get an appointment with him for months. Even superstar model Veronia Webb phones Cher and tells her what an excellent stylist Ka-Feen is. But when the cut is finally done, the results are disasterous. Trying to make the best of a bad situation, but with the response from her peers a negative one, Cher quickly realises that she is 'staging' as Travis explained the day before.

Meanwhile, strange notes continue to find thier way to Cher and she is even sent a Cuddly Toy from a secret admirer. After studying Shakespeare in class, and recognising the great writer's words with the notes she had been receiving, Cher soon puts two and two together and realises her secret admirer was Travis all along. In the end, her hair goes 'out of shock' and is fine. Cher goes to the Summer Prom with Travis and enjoys the evening of her life. Ex-Boyfriend Harrison is quickly forgotten.

I would seriously consider ordering this on DVD if it didn't cost exactly 9 million dollars. I'm betting it offers some great life lessons. Guess I'm off to drown my sorrows in a carton of mini robin's eggs instead.

p.s. I feel it must be stated for the record that when I told Lydia I was having plumbing issues this morning she seriously thought I meant that I might pee my pants in her office.

**EDIT: this post is best viewed while listening to the song "Everything Falls Apart" by Dog's Eye View, a classic mid-nineties jam that captures perfectly the spirit of this post, as it was featured during the Summer Prom scene in the above referenced Clueless episode and pretty much sums up my crap-ass life at the moment**

peanut butter pudge time!

Poor Pudge was feeling a bit left out when she found out that I posted pictures of Tela and Eartha. I have to admit I only sort of like Pudge. She's way more into Fred and she doesn't like to be picked up and snuggled like the others do. Maybe 'cause she weighs about 49 lbs and she's afraid I'll drop her or something.

Nevertheless, here's a great stuff on my cat-worthy picture of Pudge hanging out with Mr. Ping.


Pudge is also a great big sister! She always lets baby Eartha snuggle in for warmth.

What happens during tailgate...

Inevitably gets pix-messaged to you when you least expect it. Thanks, Kiks!



So, I spilled a beer on this girl. And she never realized it. And it was very funny - especially since Kiki and Stevo were positively high on grilled sausages. Really, though, I think my facial expression kinda says it all.

I also really enjoy the "picture of a picture" thing going on here. It's so...meta. It also says a lot about the effort Kiki put into sending it to me. :)

On an unrelated note, this glorious bottle of Bell's Oberon (dang, I just realized what an expensive waste of beer that spill was) happened to be part of the first 6 pack I bought after turning 21.

p.s. To dispell any further speculation that I might be wearing a DICKEY underneath Fred's oversize MSU sweatshirt - I'm not! It's called a scarf, yo!

success!

After moping around for a good three days thinking there was NO way I was going to be able to knit anything worthwhile for Baby McGormley before next weekend's shower, I happened upon the baby papoose. Perhaps there was no way I was going to be able to knit the Big Bad Baby Blanket in a mere 2 weeks, but a giant garter-stitch rectangle I could manage. And by golly, in just over 20 hours of knitting, I managed!

Overall, I'm happy with how it turned out. The colors are going to match their nursery perfectly, and are fairly gender-neutral so Kate can totally bust it out again if she ever has a baby girl. I love that it's cotton, so it can be machine-washed and dried. It's quite snuggly, yet it will stay nice and cool for the summer. I just hope she likes it!

I'm still planning on knitting a hat with some of the leftover yellow yarn.

In the meantime, on to my next project - this one's going to be for me. A pretty tank with a lotus-blossom lace pattern knit in a cotton/hemp blend. Here's hoping I can finish it in time for summer...

More papoose!

(Aw, doesn't Eartha look sweet? She doesn't look like the type of kitten that would step on your eye and nearly blind you while you're trying to catch a couple of extra ZZZs in bed on a Saturday morning, does she?)

busting out continental

I did it! I taught myself how to knit continental - no more "throwing" for this gal. Well maybe, a little bit of throwing until I feel better about my purls. What finally pushed me over the continental divide? A papoose for soon-to-be-born baby McGormley that required no less than a daunting 34,560 stitches in plain old garter-stitch pattern. I knew English-style just wasn't going to cut the mustard - my right shoulder couldn't have handled it (although the thought of being able to milk a right arm injury for at least a few recuperative weeks was appealing).

Tension is still a bit wonky, but after checking out some technique forums, that seems to be the biggest challenge for most crossover knitters. For this particular project it's not going to matter much other than seriously jacking up my gauge. Whatevs. I'll be posting pictures as soon as I sew up the little hood seam. I was seriously considering testing the papoose out on Pudge, who is larger than most babies (toddlers, even) but I'm not sure how Kate would feel about that. (Although, the pictures would be awfully cute! Maybe she doesn't need to know...)

Tela's a lolcat!

Go on, vote for her!
http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/View.aspx?ciid=695563

Eartha loves to sunbathe

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